And then what?

Fuck it, my life is the most tedious chore and i fail to see any reason for my existence through this pointless miserable life i have been given.

And if thats the case, why haven't i already ended it, i feel there must be some reason, but no matter how hard i try to think about my place in the world, i see only hopelessness.

Codeine LD50 is between 800mg and 1.2g

Thats between 80 - 120 pills.